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Moving Through Shame to Find a Brand New Joy
Who knew I wanted to be an erotica writer?… ok, probably some of you knew…
“Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things, will take their place.” ~ Rumi
I had been feeling this so acutely. The oscillation between optimism, confusion, hope, and sadness is pretty extreme sometimes. But somehow, it feels more like growing pains than anything else.
Two weeks ago, I felt so low that it felt like I had been buried somehow. Inside, I knew that everything was okay, but there was just no happiness to be had. I was sad for the world. I didn’t know how things were going to turn out. I was confused and just really blah and low.
But I had a sense that I was “cleaning house”… or more truthfully, a team of people had come in to clean my house. I wasn’t sure what they were removing… but intuitively, I knew it was a good thing and that one day, the sun would come out again.